Don't Forget to Feel Your Feelings    

 
 

 

 

Feel Your Feelings

Releasing Your Emotions

←   suppressed emotions

 

    What you can feel you can heal.


   

"Pay attention to buried feelings that you carry inside you..."



"Pay attention to buried feelings that you carry inside that you experience as discomfort and dis-ease. They exist in places within that you need to reconnect with, indicating that a part of you got stuck somewhere and has been either ignored, or left behind. Know that what you bury alive, stays alive. Take courage. Affirm and reclaim each lost part of yourself. Give the feelings a voice and they will give you a gift."


  Feelings Buried Alive Never Die


       


  Feelings Buried Alive Never Die

(From The Book "Feelings buried alive never die" written by Karol K.Truman in 1991– Practicing therapist-10: 0911207023 ISBN-13: 9780911207026)


Feelings are the Most Difficult Language to Speak with Others and with Ourselves


 

Unresolved negative feelings remain active in your physical energy field (body)

FEELINGS BURIED ALIVE NEVER DIE!

Feelings have energy
• Feelings are alive and affecting you every day
• Buried (smoldering or fermenting) feelings will demand to be realized eventually.

   

 

Buried Feelings


- Become apparent in your body through dis-ease
- Affect your relationships
- Influence your Mental, Emotional, or Financial Well-being
- Affect and influence your Behaviour

  

 

Thoughts Become Reality


• Inner peace = outer peace
• Inner turmoil = outer turmoil
• Inner fear = fearful behavior

“Whatever we choose to focus our attention on will automatically multiply in our lives.”


A focus on injustices of the past will become our trials of the present.


  • We feel good about ourselves to the exact degree to which we feel we are in control of our own life.

  • We feel bad about ourselves to the exact degree to which we feel we are controlled by outer circumstances, by other people – by things beyond our control.

 

  

 ALL CONTROL BEGINS WITH TAKING CONTROL OF THE FEELINGS WE HOLD IN OUR HEARTS


Feelings determine thoughts that lead to actions
Every thought, every feeling, and every emotion we
experience sends a message to each cell in our body
Every cell in our body is negatively or positively affected by our feelings.

 

    

 

The Top Two Feelings we are feeling are:


LOVE - All positive feelings are love-based

FEAR - All negative feelings are fear-based

We are either coming from LOVE or from FEAR
If all our feelings were love based, we wouldn't have to
go through this process. The feelings that really wreak havoc and turmoil in our lives are fear based.


Most feelings that cause discomfort and uneasiness can
be traced back to one or more of the following seven fear
categories:

  • Hate
  • Guilt
  • Anger
  • Resentment
  • Rejection/Abandonment
  • Need for Approval
  • Overwhelmed Burden

 

  

 

Unexpected Results


As you process your feelings you may find the change you had hoped for is not forthcoming. You may have unresolved generational feelings and trauma

Just keep digging for the core causes. The body may also be setting its own priority for the order of feelings being processed.

   

 
 
Hole in the Soul

 “Underneath the mask of adult behavior there is a child who was neglected. What that means is that when the child becomes an adult, there is a „hole in his soul.‟” – John Bradshaw, Healing the Shame that Binds You

The hole is due to the person‟s inability to resolve old negative feelings generated at birth or in childhood.

To Fill the Hole:
  • Get in touch with your true feelings
  • Take responsibility for your feelings (own them)
  • Resolve and release the feelings
  • Look at the past with eyes of an adult
  • Eliminate the patterns that harm you
  • Change your feelings about what happened
       
 

Self-Fulfilling Prophecies


Respect the Power of Words
Be aware of the words you speak because words have vibrational energy.

You are talking to your DNA:
– “My varicose veins”
– “My cancer”
– “My allergies”
• If you claim them, they are yours
• Be mindful of every word you speak

      

Become A More Harmonious Being


Pain is a Messenger - the message of illness
When we are in disharmony, our body will send a message of discomfort in the form of pain

Each emotion releases a different hormonal chemical into the body (i.e. fight or flight). The chemical in tears is present in other parts of the body.

If the chemical release from any emotion is prolonged, it can create a chemical imbalance in the body.

       


You are the artist of the reality you create.


Your thoughts paint your world in the colors of your feelings and emotions. Each brush stroke adds your everyday actions. The canvas is a living montage of your life expression in the gallery of human experience.” – Dr Jeff Mullan  


Exercises 

What do you feel in your body?

_____________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________

Where do you feel it?

_____________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________

Those are your feelings or your emotions and they correspond with body sensations.

_____________________________________________________________

Feelings

Write down three negative feelings you have experienced this past week.

______________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________

Feelings that Affect Success

Rank your feelings in these areas and select the top
three. Write the affirmation that balances those negative
feelings.

______________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________

 Probably Feelings Causing Illness

List your top three health concerns

We‟ll look at the list and see what negative feelings may be contributing to your dis-ease


         


If we want to be a healthy society, we need to learn to recognize this and allow ourselves to feel these sensations. Repressed emotions can lead to a continuous feedback loop of stress in our bodies. This feedback loop can lead to many unhealthy coping mechanisms not to mention  all kinds of auto-immune diseases!

Keeping feelings buried will take up a lot of energy. Your life force gets wasted when you bury your feelings.


Feeling and Expressing Your Feelings - Not Feeding Your Feelings


  Buried Feelings do not decompose!

Managing your feelings will help you gain some self-control over emotions that can be overwhelming (for example, overwhelming hate, anger, rage, sadness or shame) whatever those feelings are. Being able to cope with them as they come up is incredibly useful. What is also important is being able to make yourself feel safe whilst dealing with waves of strong feelings (especially fear).

        

Powerful feelings such as rage and anger can sometimes turn inwards on the self and it is important to learn how to nurture yourself as feelings come up and to counteract any self-blame with self-love. Empowerment in this context means positively supporting yourself however you feel, and especially if feelings of self-loathing come up.

In the case of strong difficult emotions, empowerment means letting those feeling come up and pass through to be let go of without self-harming in any way. Learning to love yourself and be your own best friend is especially important on the road to recovery and some of these meditations will help you uncover what that means for you and encourage you to actively love yourself. 


          


Feelings are neither good or bad, they just are".


I'm certain that many of you have heard this statement.  Why then do the majority believe that some feelings are good and some are bad. Why are we afraid to feel our feelings?  We know little about our emotions or feelings and even less about how to live with them, deal with them and process them out of our bodies. 

We cannot chose which feelings we will or we won't have. They're automatic. They give us immediate feedback about how a particular person or situation is affecting us.

Expressing feelings in a healthy and appropriate way is a vital part of creating and maintaining our wellbeing. Often when we talk about expressing emotions, the emphasis is on venting negative emotion and ‘blowing off steam.’ However, there is also the aspect of expressing positive feelings which is something that we frequently neglect to do.

Expressing feelings of joy, love, appreciation, enthusiasm, and wellbeing is a wonderful way to allow ourselves to feel these emotions more deeply, and to place emphasis on the good way that we are feeling and that we would like to feel more of. It is a great practice to take time throughout each day to think about, write about, or speak about the good feelings that we notice we are having.

Our positive feelings are pure, and often we fail to pay attention to them because it is a habit to ‘leave well enough alone.’ Our tendency is to place more attention onto the things that make us uncomfortable, and that we feel we need to attend to. In this context, this means our negative emotions.

        

There are times when negative emotions simply must be felt and heard in order for us to be able to eventually move past them. There are, however, other times when rather than expressing feelings, a better choice is to deliberately and consciously focus on changing the feelings.

We all experience feelings in every moment of our lives, and understanding what we are feeling and why is the first step in being able to effectively manage our emotions, rather than letting them run our lives. To be able to understand when the best course of action is expressing feelings, and when it is better to work on changing the feelings, it is important to learn to recognize the nature of the emotions that we experience.

This is not only a case of being able to identify and name the feeling, but also being able to distinguish whether the emotion that we are having is a genuine situational response to something that we are experiencing, or whether it is a habitual feeling that we have simply become accustomed to having.


        


If we start paying attention to the thoughts that are creating the feelings that we wish to improve, we can begin consciously replacing those thoughts with better feeling alternatives. It takes awareness, and persistence to do this, as mostly the thought patterns that are creating chronic emotional patterns are patterns that we have been practicing over long periods of time. The good news is though, that with conscious effort, it doesn’t take nearly as long to create a better habit as it did to create the habit that we allowed to happen by default.

Be Aware of your thoughts, for your thoughts become your words. Be Aware of your words, for your words become your actions. Be Aware of your actions, for your actions become your habits. Be Aware of your habits, for your habits become your character. Be Aware of your character, for your character becomes your destiny.
Author unknown

       


When we start to create positive change, expressing feelings can be done as a wonderful method of positive reinforcement. Once we have started consciously choosing better alternatives to the thoughts that we were having, and we notice that our moods are improving, we can really build on this success by noticing, and talking about how good we are starting to feel.

On the other side of the negative emotional equation are the uncomfortable feelings that truly need to be expressed. If you have experienced an unpleasant or painful event, and you try to just brush it aside and get on with your life and with being positive before you take time to allow yourself to feel, process, express, and release the feelings, you will end up with suppressed emotions that create mounting pressure and tension.

I have been asked by clients about how to distinguish between expressing feelings as a necessary part of creating emotional freedom, and wallowing in negative emotion. A good rule of thumb is to notice how expressing feelings makes you feel.

If you feel lighter after talking, crying, journaling, or ranting and raving, then this is a healthy and important emotional release, and you should then be feeling freer and ready to focus on something else. If on the other hand, you feel even more miserable as a result of expressing feelings then this is a good indicator that these particular feelings might not need to be expressed right now.

When expressing feelings keep in mind that the best goals are to eventually let go of strong negative emotions, to avoid reinforcing negative emotions of habit, and to nurture and strengthen positive emotions by expressing them freely and frequently.

                  

How I feel

Below are some sentence completion stems. They will help you develop your emotional literacy and become more emotionally aware. List several feelings for each one. Write down your answers quickly, using single-word feelings as often as possible. (Adapted from Nathaniel Branden)

When I am getting ready for work I often feel...

At the end of the day I often feel...

While I am at work I often feel...

With my boss I feel

With my friends ______ I feel

With my mother ______ I feel

With my father  ______ I feel

        

When my life starts to get out of control I feel


When the kids don't listen to me I feel


When I have a task plan to complete I feel


When I think about the possibility of not having a job I feel


Thinking that I am wiring my children's emotional brains, possible for the rest of their lives, I feel


Thinking that I can have a life-long effect on the children, either in a positive or a negative way, I feel

For parents

When my children don't meet my expectations I feel


When my children disobey me I feel...


When my children interrupt me I feel...

Family Life

With my spouse or partner I feel...

With my children I feel...

Around my parents I feel...

Around my family I feel...

Around my relatives I feel....

When I think of my children I feel...

General

When I think of some mistakes I made I feel...


When I think of what I have learned in my life I feel


When I think of my recent past I feel...


When I think of the future I feel...

How I Felt

In grade school I felt

In middle school I felt

In college I felt

With mother I felt

With father I felt

With my grandparents I felt

Managing Feelings

Exercise 1

Have people list some of the negative feelings which you regularly experience. Then complete the following sentence:

When I am feeling _______ I can ________

When it is rainy, I can _________.

Exercise 2

Go through another list of negative feelings and use the following general model.

When I feel ______ I need more _____.

For example,

When I am feeling uninspired, I need more inspiration.


When I am feeling resentful, I need more appreciation (towards that which you resent)


When I am feeling victimized, I need to take more responsibility.


When I am feeling out of powerless and out of control, I need to feel more powerful and in control.


When I am feeling impatient, I need to feel more patient.


 

Exercise 3

Think of a time when you were upset. Try to put yourself back into the moment and re-live it. Then ask yourself,

"How do I feel?" and list your feelings.

Next ask:

"What would help me feel better - that I can control?"

 

      


Feeling vs Emotions  


Human beings are naturally emotional beings. We often talk about how we are feeling. Over the course of our lifetimes we will experience millions of different sensations. Even over the course of a day we will not be untouched by feelings and emotions. Often, these two terms are used interchangeably, but there are differences between feelings and emotions that, if known, can help us to understand what's going on inside a little better.    

                 
Definition of Feelings and Emotions 


Feeling - has many different meanings, depending on which dictionary you consult.Feeling can either refer to something experience as a result of outside stimuli reacting with one of your five senses or someone's sensibilities, attitude or emotional perception.
Emotion - is technical a state of consciousness in which various internal sensations are experienced. Emotions can be produced by a thought, memory or external motivator and can often change our physical state. Because of this, you could say that the biggest difference between feelings and emotions is that feelings have to be triggered by an external factor whereas emotions can be completely internalized.

Examples of Feelings and Emotions


Feelings can come from the outside world reacting with any of our five senses: warmth, cold, hot, dry, dusty, drench can come from a physical sensation – hungry, thirsty, hurt, ticklish, itchy, tingly. Feelings can come from the result of an emotion – sad, happy, excited, nervous, disgusted, scared, overjoyed
 
Emotion – can be categorized by degree. For example, disgust can be classed as a lesser degree of hatred. However, several emotional theories state that there are five emotions that are similar to all cultures: love, hate, joy, sorrow, and fear.

 
Experiencing Feelings and Emotions    

                 
Feelings are thought to be experienced for short periods of time. If you touch a stove it feels hot and you quickly remove your hand. Within minutes you are no longer feeling hot. If someone jumps out at you from around a corner you will feel startled, but that will soon pass. Feelings of excitement will subside after the awaited event is done.       
 
Emotions are often said to be long - term states. If you are in love, that emotion will usually last years. Sorrow too, takes a long time to go away. Because emotions are internal you have to change your mind set to change your emotion and this process takes time  

 
  • Emotions and feelings are both sensations experienced by humans.

  • Feelings are triggered by external stimuli whereas emotions come from your mind, and possibly, soul.

  • Feelings can include physical sensations as well as mental states, but emotions always come from your mind.

  • Feelings are often temporary and subside once the stimulus is no longer present, whereas emotions will stay with you for years because they are seated in your mind.

Emotions are sensations you can feel in your body. You can also “feel” them with your mind, but that’s a dangerous place for an emotion to live because your mind tend to spin things out of control when you are not paying attention.
People spend much time talking about how they feel. They attend workshops, they visit therapists, and they tell others who did what to them and describe how they feel about it.

They talk and talk about their feelings but they don’t feel their feelings. They intellectualize and analyze their feelings without feeling them.

Many people are afraid to really feel their feelings, afraid of losing control, afraid of the pain involved in feeling their emotions, of feeling the sense of loss or failure or whatever the emotion brings with it. People are afraid to cry. So much of life is about what you feel rather than what you think. Being strongly connected to your emotional life is essential to living a life with high energy and a sense of fulfillment and satisfaction.


 

The following are a few examples of the methods people use to avoid feeling their emotions.


  • Ignoring your feelings
  • Pretending something hasn’t happened
  • Overeating
  • Eating foods loaded with sugar and fat
  • Excessive drinking of alcohol
  • Excessive use of recreational drugs
  • Using prescription drugs such as tranquilizers or Prozac
  • Exercising compulsively
  • Any type of compulsive behavior
  • Excessive sex with or without a partner
  • Always keeping busy so you can’t feel
  • Constant intellectualizing and analyzing
  • Excessive reading or TV
  • Working Excessively
  • Keeping conversations superficial
  • Burying angry emotions under the mask of peace and love
It’s easy to take our feelings for granted and to assume that the people we care about know how we feel about them


Feel Your Emotions - Don’t Analyze Them!


Many of us do not feel our emotions fully, especially emotions we tend to think of as negative; for instance, anger, sadness, fear, hate, doubt, shame, jealousy, and resentment. Regardless of why we do not feel our emotions, the end result is the same.


     


How are you feeling today?


In many cultures there is a great deal of confusion about feelings - especially the strong or painful ones. TV and movies portray people expressing themselves passionately and violently, but in everyday life there isn't much permission to rock the emotional boat. It is often considered a sign of weakness to display fear or grief overtly. The desired countenance is one of strength and control, and children are taught, at least by example, to be brave, to act "cool."


People are often very uncomfortable when those around them "break down".


Others think there is something wrong with themselves when they feel de - pressed. The cultural norms about anger are really confused. People overlook and sometimes even expect the exchange of angry words in public among strangers, and may applaud it as a motivator to sports and competition and war. The same people then express disbelief or horror when a close friend or family member expresses anger with them or learns that battering and other forms of abuse are going on close to home. Some people are shocked to discover how much anger they have, and try to repress it, while others use anger as a way to eliminate any emotional energy that they don't know how to handle.

It's all right to sing in church or to dance at a party or nightclub. But you might be thought crazy if you burst into song in a department store or dance ecstatically in the town square. There are many unwritten rules about expressing feelings.



Experience Your Feelings


We have many defense mechanisms in place, because we do not feel safe feeling our emotions, but in fact we are safe to do so. The experience is rarely as painful as our mind would have us believe, and it is rarely as painful as living with pain that has been buried for years or even decades. Feeling our feelings won’t harm us, it’s more so that not feeling our feelings will. Our emotions aren’t going to go away. They are patient and will wait as long as it takes until we are ready to listen. a feeling, it will pass”.

If you allow yourself to sit with the feeling and just feel it, instead of trying to run from it and cover it up with food, smoking, alcohol, drugs, sex, business, you may be amazed to find that you do not fall apart, you are still intact, and the feeling does eventually pass. If we reach for that food based on a feeling that may be replaced by another one in five minutes (or much less!), why not sit with it now, and just feel it? A thought that I like to remember is “If it’s coming up, it’s on its way out”. Whatever you feel is coming up to be felt; if you allow it, it will pass, it just wants to be heard so it can be on its way. It only wants to be heard, just like a child does.

 

Try this the next time you find yourself about to reach for your emotional "fix"

  • Grab your notebook or journal and set a timer for 10 minutes.


  • Sit quietly and breath slowly and deeply to calm yourself.

  • Notice what you are feeling.

  • In your journal, jot down how you are feeling whether you feel numbness, anger, sadness, whatever you feel, write it down.

  • Continue to write about how you are feeling while continuing your deep breathing. Try to remain calm while at the same time feeling your emotions.

  • If you feel the need to cry then do so, if you are angry, pound that pillow.

  • Keep writing, remaining conscious of your emotions until your timer goes off.

  • After your timer goes off, if you still want to eat then go ahead, while maintaining the awareness that you are eating in the attempt to make yourself feel better.

  • Strive to avoid feeling guilty if you do eat at this time, reminding yourself that you are now in the process of change, and that you initially learned to eat emotionally as a way to cope.


       

Those feelings that so desperately want to have your attention must be recognized in order for them to be “cleaned out”. Even though it may be scary and not feel good much of the time, “the only way out is through”, and the way out is to feel your emotions.

Your goal with this exercise is not to “solve” your emotions, it is only to feel, and to affirm to yourself that “it is only a feeling, it will pass”. Feelings are not a judgment; they are only feelings, however you need to allow yourself to experience them so that they can be released. The more you release the old feelings that you have been stuffing with food, the less you will have the need to eat over your emotions. The more you feel, the less fear you will have of those emotions that you were trying to cover up with your emotional fix, thereby releasing the need to continue the cover up.

The emotion is not bigger than you are.

Don't be afraid of being overwhelmed by an emotion; in reality, it almost never happens. What makes the feeling so powerful is the energy you put into not admitting you are feeling it. Fear, anger, guilt, and resentment - these are all like small children pulling at your leg. They get louder and louder until you finally ask what they want. Most of the time, the response is "nothing." What they want is your attention, and once they have it, they can move on. 

       

The truth is, we protect ourselves from the depth of our unwanted feelings, i.e., hurt, guilt, shame, failure, fear, etc., because it feels so enormous we fear we can't survive it. We look for ways to escape it. We may freeze and hold ourselves in stillness, anesthetizing ourselves, becoming so good at it that we live a half - life, feeling little or nothing at all. Some of us fight hurt off. We deny, deny, deny, striving to believe nothing's there, but periodically losing the fight in an outburst of anger or sadness or both. Some of us run from it-using success, caretaking, business, distraction, addictive or compulsive behaviors including rage as avenues of escape. From this perspective, it's easy to see how alcohol, drugs, food, as in over-eating or not eating, spending, gambling, and addictive sex can fit into the picture. An addiction often begins because a substance or activity can protect us from feeling our hurt.

        

When we learn to sit with deep feelings, we also discover what is me and what is not me. Consider this. When we are unable to own our deepest feelings, we don't know who we are. When we don't know who we are, we either can't decide what we want and don't want or we can't express it. When we don't know - or can't express - what we want and don't want, we have no boundaries and without even knowing we're doing it, we give too much of ourselves away over and over again. Feeling feelings empowers us. Once we learn we can survive feeling the hurts we have dreaded for a lifetime, we come to see we can also survive negative reactions of those around us when we say, "Yes. I want this." or "No. I don't want that.'

        

In my years as a Transpersonal Councellor and homeopath, I've found that combining therapy with another practice can be very powerful. Link: transpersonal councelling

For instance, Homeopathy, Reiki, Acupuncture, Massage, Reflexology, and Cranial - sacral therapy can help release feelings that are held at a cellular level. Yoga and meditation teach us to be still and experience thoughts, feelings and sensations as bubbles arising and dissolving in our awareness. Spiritual practices-ritual, prayer, chant, the labyrinth, retreats - encourage and support stillness and the belief that we are guided, blessed, and showered with grace, and teach that we can withstand whatever comes because we are not alone.

Combining  transpersonal councelling with at least one other modality also assures that our common fear of being left just as we begin to let go control-that we'll be abandoned in some way by the therapist-doesn't have the same power to frighten when we have other guides on whom we can rely.


          

 
What happens when you can't say what you feel?
  • Weak voice
  • Thyroid problems
  • Hearing problems
  • Sore throat
  • Laryngitis
  • Gingivitis
  • Teeth issues
  • Lung/ respiratory disorders
  • Inability to express yourself
  • Shy
  • Critical
  • Lying
  • Emotional
  • Disempowered
  • Feeling trapped
  • Poor learning abilities
 
           FEELINGS BURIED ALIVE NEVER DIE!

There is a heavy price to be paid when feelings are denied or repressed.

 
Lethargy, boredom, and a sense of deadness toward life may be the sorry consequence. When this happens, bigger and stronger forms of stimulation are required to feel happy and alive. Some people drink, others drive recklessly. Paradoxically, some people get seriously ill as a way to get attention and still feel alive.

       

Some people punish themselves with their own anger or guilt; they close themselves off completely from help, and therefore from the healing potential of human relationships, withdrawing from others to obsess about their own wounds. Those who are unaccustomed to dealing with feelings in healthy ways often seek out other means to cover their feelings, or to distract themselves from feeling at all. At the first inklings of pain, fear, or loneliness, they may turn to alcohol, food, drugs, TV, unhealthy relationships, or compulsive work. Thus, bigger problems, more pain, and more fear are created in a terrified attempt to avoid pain and fear.

         

In considering the connection between wellness and feelings, I have seen what happens with clients when "emotional" energy - anger and sadness in particular - gets blocked.

Depression ( suppressed emotions ) is common with people who do not allow themselves to experience rage or grief. And depression will weaken the immune system, making the whole body more susceptible to disease. Other people literally create body armor by severely tightening muscles in an attempt to defend against painful emotions. Such armored bodies are more apt to develop symptoms of chronic pain and crippling disease.


       


Letting out and letting go of feelings

Letting go


Quieten yourself and stop doing other external activities. Relax your body and focus on where your strongest feelings are. Let those feeling come up. At first doing this may feel difficult and you may feel overcome by emotion. The more you let your feelings out the more it is important to actually let them out without feeling overwhelmed by them. Then intend to let them go.

        

This takes a certain level of detachment that meditation can give you. Self-pity is not your friend here; neither is getting lost in feeling, or adopting victim mentality. The onus is on letting your feelings go so you can be clear of them rather than stay stuck inside them. If you get stuck within a lot of grief or hurt, come back to noticing your breathing and, remind yourself that you are positively 'letting go'. This requires a lot of self-awareness, which requires constant cultivation. Practice makes it easier.

        

Adopt the attitude that feelings are natural and normal. This is a primary healing attitude. Strong feelings are not indicators of something "bad." Feelings have no morality. They just are. Even if you are uncomfortable with them, accept strong emotions as valuable feedback telling you that something in your life is in need of attention. And the best attention is gentle acceptance. Befriend the emotional parts of yourself.


        


Write about your feelings


Express and explore your feelings on paper, e.g. write an angry letter and then tear it up, or compose a poem about your grief. There are many books that suggest ways to use writing for self-help.               

Link: Journaling Healing through writing


Draw or paint or dance your feelings

Link soul therapies soul therapies  This is a healthy way to defuse potential explosive emotions and to soothe painful ones. When you've expressed yourself creatively, you may have a whole new perspective on the situation and may be in a more balanced place from which to speak to others.


Exercise.                                             

Exert yourself, as much as your condition or health issue allows this.  Exercising, even brisk walking will take the emphasis off the worrying mind and encourage fuller breathing, which is a powerful healer of emotional wounds. Try digging a hole and voicing your emotional pain into that hole. Then when you are finished, fill the hole back up with soil.


Talk about your feelings

If you are confused, you can always start a conversation with a friend by saying, "I am not sure what I'm feeling," and proceed from there. Your listeners may not have answers for you, but the process of speaking opens the door for both clarification and support.


Change your mind.                                   

Because thoughts arouse feelings, if you change what you are focusing on or thinking about, your feelings will change accordingly. When you are feeling frightened or inadequate, remember a time when you were strong and competent and create a mental image to support that. This type of imagery is used in many healing disciplines.


Here is a simple exercise

That will help you sensitize yourself to how and where emotions affect your body, and will encourage you to accept emotions as natural expressions of your being. You can do this exercise alone or invite a friend to help you. Sit or lie down in a comfortable place. Close your eyes and breathe slowly and deeply to help you relax.

Repeat the following phrases five times each, very slowly but energetically, so you can really generate the mood of the phrase. (Or ask your friend to say them for you.)


As you speak, focus all of your attention on the physical sensations that these words evoke.

  • I am scared
  • I give up
  • I hate you
  • I love you
  • Please don’t leave me
  • No, no, no
  • Yes, yes, yes.
  • Add an emotionally charged phrase of your own.

Try to sense where these various emotions "live" in your body and how they affect you physically.


Repeat the exercise, but this time let the feelings come and go as if they were currents of air blowing through you. You can learn to feel your feelings without identifying with them so closely that they overpower you. Let fear be there. Let discouragement be there. Don't try to chase them away. Look at them. Then move on to the next emotional statement.

Share with your friend, or write about, what you have learned as a result of doing this.


JOY:

 List several ways you can increase joy in your life. Pick one of these things.


APPRECIATION:

List at least five things you accomplished last year that you feel good about. These can be minor or major accomplishments.  You have probably accomplished even more than you realize or have given yourself credit for:

  • Think of at least five things you are grateful for right now in your life.

  • Think of at least three people to whom you would like to show your appreciation for their support right now.  Be specific about what you would like to do, and then do it.

  • Think of several (at least) beautiful sights, sounds, events or memories.  Record them. What do you feel when you think of them?

How do you appreciate…    

  • Your body:
  • Your family
  • Your friends
  • Your home
  • Your spirituality
  • Your world
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Let People know that you love them


But while those we love are often quite cognizant of our feelings, saying "I love you" is a gift we should give to our loved ones whenever we can. Letting people know you love them is an important part of nurturing any kind of loving relationship. Few people tire of being told they are loved, and saying "I love you" can make a world of difference in someone’s life, take a relationship to a new level, or reaffirm and strengthen a steady bond. 
             
Everyone needs to hear the words "I love you." Three simple words – I - Love - You. When you declare your love for someone you admit to them that you care for them in the most significant way.
It can be difficult to express your love using words, particularly if you grew up around people that never expressed their affection verbally. But you should never be afraid to say "I love you" or worry that doing so will thrust you into a position of excessive vulnerability. It is important to share your feelings with those that matter to you.
           
Part of the fulfillment that comes with loving someone is telling them that you love them. Besides, love exists to be expressed, not withheld. If you love someone, and I mean not only your spouse or partner or your children, let them know.

           

Don't be to shy express your emotions. Don't be afraid of the strength of your emotions or worry that the other person or love one won't feel the same way. Besides, the words "I love you" are often best said to another without expectation of a return investment. Express your love often to as many people as you  feel an affection too, not only to your lover, spouse, partner or children.

             

As each one of us is filled with an abundance of love, there is never any worry that you’ll run out of love if your expression of love isn’t said back to you. Saying, "I love you" is a gift of the heart sent directly via words to the heart of a recipient. Even though it may not always look that way, love from the heart is an offering that is always unconditional and given without strings attached. That is the true essence of the gift of "I love you."

 

 

   Releasing Your Emotions

←   suppressed emotions

 



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